HAPPY NEW YEAR!

To celebrate the arrival of 2019, editors Paula Stokes and Emily Hainsworth are offering first ten pages critiques for just $19 all month. That's almost 50% off our normal fee of $35. If you've been working hard on revising your NaNoWriMo project or you just want to find out if the beginning of your current work-in-progress is working, now's the time! To take advantage of this special, you must email us to request this service by January 31.

Our normal turn-around for a ten-page critique is one to two weeks, but due to an expected increase in submissions, we reserve the right to take up to four weeks to complete your $19 ten-page critique. Check with your individual editor for specific information on turn-around time.

Prior to submitting your work, please read our Terms of Service and Submission Guidelines. All of the usual "fine print" applies to this deal, and submitting to us indicates that you have read and agree with our guidelines and terms of service.

If you still have questions, check out our FAQs or drop us a line at manuscriptcritiqueservices@gmail.com. 

I’m delighted that Manuscript Critique Services will be adding a new editor to our roster for 2016. My dear friend and personal critique partner, Emily Hainsworth is joining our team.
 
Emily is the author of THROUGH TO YOU (Harper, 2012) and make sure to check out her latest novel, TAKE THE FALL, which releases this February from Harper. She’s a master of suspense, character development, and twisty endings! She’s also an amazingly insightful and thorough editor. Emily has been critiquing my writing since my very first novel and is so invaluable to me that I dedicated my last book to her! I’m thrilled that she’s come on board to share her skills with all of you!
 
Emily is open to world-wide submissions. You can read more about her writing and what she’s looking for on our Editors page as well as check out other’s feedback about her critiques here.

~Tiffany

2015 has been a great year at MCS. We've welcomed a new member to our team (hello Tiffany!), worked on some amazing projects and even written a few books between it all. 

As we strive to give our clients the very best of ourselves, we have decided during this busy holiday period to not take on any new submissions, so we can focus our full efforts on our existing projects. As such, we will be closed to submissions from 1 December 2015. But never fear, as we will be reopening our doors in January 2016, where we will be running a giveaway, so keep your eyes peeled! 

Happy holidays and even happier reading!

Liz, Paula, Jess and Tiffany

As Paula mentioned in our last post, we've experienced some changes at MCS over the last few months. With Tara leaving and Elizabeth on hiatus, we decided to bring on another editor. The first person I thought of was my friend Tiffany Schmidt, and I'm so happy that she's agreed to work with us!

Tiffany is the author of SEND ME A SIGN (Bloomsbury, 2012), BRIGHT BEFORE SUNRISE (Bloomsbury, 2014), and the upcoming HOLD ME LIKE A BREATH (Bloomsbury, May). She's an incredibly talented writer and has an encouraging but discerning eye as an editor. I know this first-hand because she's one of my critique partners, and her feedback on the Cahill Witch Chronicles and on my upcoming novel WILD SWANS has been invaluable. No detail is too small to slip past Tiffany; she's great about everything from asking insightful world-building questions to pointing out dialogue that doesn't feel quite natural to letting me know when a scene isn't as swoony as it could be.

Tiffany is currently open to submissions world-wide. You can find out more about what she's looking for here and read some fabulous testimonials from her critique partners here. 

- Jess

Hi! It's Paula. I just wanted to wish you a Happy New Year and let you know about a few changes here at MCS that will go into effect on January 1, 2015. 

Let's begin with editorial changes. Tara Kelly sold two books in 2014 and is stepping away from editorial duties to focus on her writing and other pursuits. Look for ENCORE and FOXGLOVE both coming in 2015/2016 from Entangled Publishing. Congratulations, Tara. We wish you all the best! Elizabeth Richards is going on a temporary editorial hiatus, but will continue to be around as our webmaster and internet consultant. She plans to return to MCS editing in a few months. We'll keep you posted :)

That leaves Jessica Spotswood and me as editors for the time being. Both Jess and I are very excited to work with our MCS clients, but we both also sold multiple books in 2014 and our plates are quite full. That means--you guessed it--we're on the prowl for another editor. We've been talking to some interested parties and we'll share more details once someone officially comes aboard. In the meantime, please continue to send us your submissions, but realize that full manuscript critiques might take a bit longer than they normally do. 

We've made a couple small price adjustments to our fixed package prices, but are pleased to tell you that our hourly rate for larger critiques will remain the same for 2015 ($30/hr or $25/hr for students with valid ID).

Happy reading and writing. We wish you all the best in 2015.

Happy Friday! Whoops, it's Saturday, isn't it? Such is the life of a writer, to always be a little behind (and to split the occasional infinitive!) Plus yesterday was an epic day in Portland and sometimes you have to embrace those epic days when you get them. 

This month's MM is about less being more. I am calling this post Volume One, because there is so much to say when it comes to less is more that I would turn this into a Twenty-Minute Masterclass if I said it all here. Plus, I am betting my colleagues have their own opinions about less being more, and I want to leave it open for them to expound on this idea.

Have you ever been to a play? You know how the actors project their voices and make big arm flourishes and dramatic gestures? Imagine if you took all that and put it in a TV show. That would be kind of campy and ridiculous, right? TV actors have to be much more subtle because the camera (and therefore the audience) is often only a foot away from them.

When you write, especially when you write in first person POV, think of the audience as being very close. What that means is that screaming and shouting and stamping of feet, etc., is all amplified. The same goes for exclamation points and emphasized italics. Too much of this reads like an email written in all caps, so you want to use these things in moderation. And in most cases, you don’t need to layer them on top of each other.

Consider the following example:

      “I can ruin you, you know that?!” Kendall shouts at Micah. “I can make sure that no one ever speaks to you!” Her face contorts into a snarl.
      “Stop it, Kendall! That’s enough!”  I holler. I give her wrist another vicious yank. “Quit being a bitch!”
       She looks at me in surprise, rubbing her wrist where I grabbed her. “No! It’s not enough!" she screams. "No friend of mine is—”
      Of course! Once again Kendall is making my problems all about her! “This has nothing to do with you!” I shriek. This time she finally lets me drag her away.
      “What has gotten into you!?” she hisses. “Did you really just call me a bitch? I was defending you since you seem incapable of doing it yourself.”

This is part of a climax scene, and it’s supposed to be full of emotion. But can you see how all of the shouting, snarling, shrieking, italics, and exclamation points make it feel over the top? Maybe you didn't mind, but can you imagine a whole book written like that? Some writers tend to do this so readers will definitely understand all the strong feelings that are present. But reading page after page of this gets exhausting, and it just serves to lessen the emotional impact of each additional snarl or shout. Instead, trust your reader. Think TV show, not stage play. If you are doing a good job of showing, you won’t need excessive formatting and dialogue tags.  

Here’s the version that actually made it into the story.

     “I can ruin you, you know that?” Kendall shouts at Micah. “I can make sure that no one ever speaks to you.”
     “Stop it, Kendall. That’s enough!” I give her wrist another vicious yank. “Quit being a bitch.”
     She looks at me in surprise, rubbing her wrist where I grabbed her. “No. It’s not enough. No friend of mine is—”
     Of course. Once again Kendall is making my problems all about her. “This has nothing to do with you,” I say. This time she finally lets me drag her away.
     “What has gotten into you?” she asks. “Did you really just call me a bitch? I was defending you since you seem incapable of doing it yourself.”
                                                                         --from The Art of Lainey by Paula Stokes

Did I lose any emotional impact in Version 2? What do you think?

Hi! Paula here. Welcome to the latest Minute Masterclass. We've been doing this series for a few months, and now seems like a great time to emphasize that the things we're sharing with you are just guidelines. Maybe you’re a person who follows a hundred publishing blogs and obeys every single "rule" of querying and writing that you read. And yet you don’t get full-requests. But then your friend comes along, writes one letter or manuscript that breaks all the rules, and has agents fighting over her. What gives?

I used to be Suzie Rule Follower, so if you’re in the above situation, I feel your pain. Here’s the thing, though. When someone says “adverbs are lazy” or “show, don’t tell” they mean “For the most part, adverbs are lazy” and “For the most part, show don’t tell.” You can add this “for the most part” to pretty much every writing “rule” you have ever heard. Even the “laws” of grammar are flexible in certain instances.

But then how do you know when it’s okay to break the “rules?” Essentially, it’s okay to do anything you want, as long as you do it well. Not helpful? What about this: If you are using adverbs, telling, passive voice etc. you need to know why you are doing it. And that reason cannot be “because it’s easier.”

When I turned in my first draft of the Venom proposal, the immediate feedback from my editors was something like: “This is pretty writing, but Cassandra is reading like a lens painting across Venice without any internal thoughts or feelings. We need to know what’s going on inside her head.” Can you guys guess why I hadn’t included Cass’s thoughts or feelings? Because to me, this was “telling” and it had been drilled into me from a hundred publishing blogs and books that telling was bad.

Open up your favorite bestseller. Mark the telling. Mark the adverbs. Mark the passive voice. Mark anything else you’ve been instructed not to do. Chances are, you didn’t even notice these “violations” while you were reading because the author utilized them to strengthen the story, not as writing crutches.

No one wants you to write a book without telling. No one wants you to write a book without adverbs. Don’t let fear of breaking the rules keep you from writing the very best book that you can. Happy weekend :)

Today I'm sharing some really common mistakes I see with punctuation and dialogue in both my critique clients and the writing workshops I teach.

Here's an example from SISTERS' FATE:

INCORRECT

“You’ve decided to come?” She asks. “You look pretty.”

I glare at her. “I do not,” I look like a tall, skinny blond vulture in the Sisters’ uniform. I always do.

“Hush and take the compliment.” She insists, braving a hug. She smells like hot cocoa and the maple candies her mother’s always sending from their farm in Vermont. “Are you all right? You seem . . . pricklier than usual.”

“I’m fine,” I’m not fine. What’s O’Shea cooking up now? Hundreds of Brothers will be at the bazaar. Any of us could make a misstep and be arrested. Things seem so on edge. And beyond that--

“Are you worried Finn will be there?” Rilla cuts right to the heart of it.

CORRECT

“You’ve decided to come?” she asks. “You look pretty.”

I glare at her. “I do not.” I look like a tall, skinny blond vulture in the Sisters’ uniform. I always do.

“Hush and take the compliment,” she insists, braving a hug. She smells like hot cocoa and the maple candies her mother’s always sending from their farm in Vermont. “Are you all right? You seem . . . pricklier than usual.”

“I’m fine.” I’m not fine. What’s O’Shea cooking up now? Hundreds of Brothers will be at the bazaar. Any of us could make a misstep and be arrested. Things seem so on edge. And beyond that--

“Are you worried Finn will be there?” Rilla cuts right to the heart of it.

NOTES
* Before a dialogue tag (she asks, she insists, she says), use a comma (or exclamation or question mark, if appropriate - but NOT a period) to end the quoted sentence, then close the quotation marks. DON'T capitalize the next word.  
* If the following sentence is NOT a dialogue tag, and is a full sentence in its own right, use a period (or question or exclamation mark, but NOT a comma), then close the quotation marks. The next word SHOULD be capitalized. 
* I actually cut most of my dialogue tags (she says, she snaps, she hisses, etc) in revision in order to layer in description. Check out this post for examples!

Hello and Happy Friday! Tara here. 

The V-word. We hear it a lot, right? Everyone's looking for that manuscript with a "great voice". If that voice is just right, agents and editors might be willing to overlook some plot or writing issues. If the voice isn't right, they won't get past the first page. Yeah, yeah. We know. Voice is important. 

But how do we find it? 

When they say voice can't be taught, they aren't lying. Your writing voice is something that can only come from you, and it will change throughout your life. So, I can't tell you how to develop a killer voice in a minute. But I can give you a couple ideas on where to start. 

1. Pick your favorite character from a book and write a scene introducing them. Do not use the original author's descriptions or words. Use your own. 

• Who are they and what do they want most in life?
  
• How do they talk? 
  
• What kind of music do they listen to? 
  
• What do they fear the most? 

You'll probably notice that this character, despite being someone else's creation, now sounds like a different character entirely. This is YOUR voice. 

2. Repeat the process above with your own character, always keeping in mind who your character is and what they want at their core. Who knows... You may have just end up writing the opening scene to your next book. 

Until next time!

Happy Friday and welcome to Minute Masterclass. I'm a little embarrassed to admit that up until recently--when I was doing copy-edits for my fourth book--I thought awhile and a while were basically interchangeable.  Luckily, I had both a copy-editor and a super-smart beta reader set me straight at the same time.

Here's the scoop: awhile is an adverb. It means "for an unspecified amount of time." A while is a noun, like a puppy or an hour. Note the use of the article a. Any time you use a prepositional phrase, such as in a while or for a while, it's always a while, because the object of a preposition has to be a noun. Here are a few examples:

I'm going to read awhile.
Please think awhile before you respond.
I'm going to read for a while.
It took me a while to realize the truth.

Notice that if you can substitute in another adverb, like silently, you want awhile, as in example one and two. If you can substitute in an hour, as in example three and four, you want a while.

I find that I use a while almost exclusively when I write:

“Something I should have done a while ago.” Jason leans back and nods at his handiwork. “This is your jersey.”  His hands linger for a moment on my waist. "It's always been yours." --Paula Stokes, The Art of Lainey

Bee reclines on my bed. “Elaine Mitchell. I’ve been your friend for ten years. You’re family. Maybe I want to strangle you every once in a while, but I will never tell you to get lost, okay? I would miss you too much.”
--Paula Stokes, The Art of Lainey

What about you? Do you use both awhile and a while? Did you know the difference? Do you have a grammar or writing question you want MCS to investigate?